Every relationship holds both intimacy and conflict. It’s part of being human together. But when criticism feels constant, when one or both partners start pulling away emotionally, or when the same arguments circle without resolution, it can feel exhausting and lonely. That’s often a sign it might help to have a guide in your corner.

Our couples therapists use a blend of approaches such as Emotion-Focused Therapy (EFT), Internal Family Systems (IFS), and somatic awareness to help you move from feeling stuck in conflict to finding each other again.

In our work together, we might start with something simple but powerful: a journal exercise where each of you completes prompts such as, “I feel closest to you when…” and “I feel distant when…” Bringing these reflections into the session helps you hear each other in a new way and uncovers needs that might not have been spoken aloud. Sometimes it’s the smallest realizations, like learning that a morning “how’s your day looking?” matters more than a big weekend getaway, that begin to shift the connection

We also use EFT Enactment Tasks, which guide you through structured, heartfelt conversations. Imagine one partner saying, “I’m afraid you don’t value me,” and the other responding, “I hear that you feel unimportant when I work late without checking in.” These moments create safety, trust, and even biological changes in your brain, sparking the same bonding chemicals that help us feel secure and connected.

Signs You Might Benefit from Couples Therapy

Ongoing cycles of criticism, defensiveness, or contempt
Avoidance of intimacy or shutting down during conflicts
Feeling more like roommates than romantic partners
Past infidelities or betrayals eroding trust

Our approach also includes somatic practices like synchronized breathing, which help calm the nervous system and bring partners into emotional sync. If you and your partner feel stuck or unable to hear each other, Ember Psychotherapy Collective offers compassionate couples therapy to help you return to understanding, closeness, and lasting connection.